We love our apartments. We really do. We love the vintage, pink tiling in the bathroom, the huge leather couch we found on OfferUp, the fact that the ceiling squeaks every time our upstairs neighbor so much as takes a step… You know, small stuff like that.
In other words, get us out of here. And take us somewhere else, fast. Somewhere fun and beautiful and preferably, where we don’t have to hear two people constantly arguing about who’s turn it is to walk the dog. Is that too much to ask? So from plant-packed green houses to massive Japanese castles, and a secluded garden filled with rare gems, here’s 10 Totally Unique, Talented, Brilliant, Incredible, Amazing, Showstopping, Spectacular, Never The Same, Completely Not Ever Been Done Before patios in LA.
Spot prawns and vermicelli noodles, caviar in koji butter, and dungeness crab soup — these are just a few things you can expect from a night at Kato, an omakase-style Taiwanese restaurant in West LA. The multi-course, prix-fixe menu changes daily, but what stays consistent is th eunique mix of the familiar and the not-so-familiar — Chinese-style steamed fish and mapo tofu live on the same menu as three cup abalone and tapioca made with boniato yams, a sweet potato popular in Caribbean cooking. Which is a long way of saying: no matter what’s on the menu, you’re in for a pleasant, unexpected ride that lasts for hours. Kind of like the time we got stuck on the Pirates of Caribbean ride at Disneyland and they gave us all fastpasses afterwards. Reservations for Kato’s patio can be made here.
The classic West Hollywood drag bar has pivoted in a big way in quarantine, taking over an entire adjacent parking lot with astroturf, tables, and yes, plenty of drag queens. They’re open Wednesday through Sunday with nightly bingo (except on Friday and Saturdays), plus their famous drag queen brunch on the weekends. There are two separate brunch seatings (11am and 1pm), and reservations are a must.
The team behind one of our favorite Vietnamese comfort food spots, Porridge and Puffs, just opened a new fine dining experience complete with rare gems - a secluded outdoor garden, and a one-of-a-kind journey through the land, sea, and air. No, we’re not talking about the time you got super high and accidentally watched The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe twice in a row (Mr. Tumnus looked pretty cute though), we’re talking about chef Minh Phan’s latest restaurant, Phenakite. Located in the colorful, newly built coworking space, Second Home, Phenakite is a nine-course meal including dishes like braised short ribs, pan-smoked abalone, and a sweet, creamy carrot ice cream presented in homemade pottery. It’s a bit of theater, a little pyrotechnics, and 100% a dining experience to write home about. Well, or at least in your gratitude journal. Reservations can be made here.
Lady Byrd Cafe
In what might just be the most oxygen-filled set-up in town, Lady Byrd Cafe has placed plant-filled greenhouses around every table, ensuring maximum English garden aesthetics. Couple that with a menu that includes breakfast burritos, bolognese, and fresh green juices, and this new all-day cafe in Echo Park might just be as good of an al fresco dining situation as you’ll find. Who knows? All of that exposure to greenery might even clear up any cases of moderate-to-severe adult acne, or finally make you understand what they mean by “one with nature.”
If you’ve been missing your KBBQ fix, we have some good news — Chosun Galbee has reopened its jungle-like patio. Large, granite tables outfitted with metal grills are surrounded by koi ponds and a literal forest of trees — a situation so peaceful and beautiful, you might just forget the fact that you haven’t interacted normally with another human being for close to a year. But who’s counting? Make sure to focus on the excellent meat selection here — we’re talking lean slices of beef tongue, prime brisket cuts, and of course, the namesake chosun galbee. Call (323) 734-3330 to make a reservation.
After months of spending all of your time in the same 350 square feet in Los Feliz (you can’t tell, but we’re smiling really really hard and trying not to cry lol), it’s time to make like JoJo in 2004 and leave. Get out! And take a drive up to The Old Place — the historic saloon in Santa Monica Mountains has shifted to a takeout-only menu that includes cinnamon rolls for breakfast, sandwiches during lunch, and giant sirloin steaks at dinner. Then just find a spot on their sprawling, wrap-around deck for excellent food, a relaxed atmosphere, and some of the cleanest-smelling air in the state. You deserve it.
The massive Japanese restaurant in the Hollywood Hills has reopened its patio — so if you’ve been missing that sense of old, Los Angeles glamour or just want to feel like you’ve been dropped into the Ghost of Tsushima game for PS5, you’re in luck. In addition to birds-eye views of the city, enclosed tent covers, and lots of heat lamps, Yamashiro also serves dishes like soy ginger pork rib, pork dumplings, skewered yakitori, and hibachi pineapple fried rice. Reservations can be made here.
Perhaps you recently inherited a ton of money, or maybe you just paid your 2019 income taxes and finally received your stimulus check in mail — but if you’re looking for something properly opulent, head to The Peninsula Beverly Hills. The five-star hotel has converted their outdoor garden terrace into a new concept called “Le Petite Belvedere,” which serves a variety of Very British dishes like scones, cucumber sandwiches, and a whole lot of champagne. Perfect for an afternoon tea, lunch, or recreating the less risque scenes of Bridgerton. Reservations can be made here.
We don’t really know where the beginning of 2021 went (our brains have become melted by Twitter), but we’ll tell you one thing - it has not been a f*cking party. Berkshire House changes all of that. This large sports bar secretly has one of the most bumping patios around. Located on La Brea Ave., the new, massive space has taken over its adjoining parking lot and filled it with astroturf, long picnic tables, and string lights covering the entire patio. There are also weekly specials that include 25-cent wings on Wednesdays and BOGO late night Happy Hour. Go nuts. But do it while wearing a mask!
Swedish mini pancakes covered in a strawberry glaze, grass-fed burgers topped with pepperoncini aioli, and ocean views so breathtaking, you’ll have to pinch yourself to make sure you’re not stuck in some desktop screensaver from the early 2000s — if you’re searching for serenity via outdoor dining, Malibu Farm should be your first choice. The casual spot on the Malibu pier has reopened its sunny patio at the end of the pier (be careful though not to fall off though), for brunch and dinner — just be sure to make a reservation, first. Oh, and pack some sunblock You can never be too safe.